If a stack of paperwork launched on Friday by the particular counsel, Robert S. Mueller III, and by federal prosecutors in New York had been an excessive amount of to sustain with, why not conclude your week with a bedtime story within the firm of Eric Trump and Donald Trump Jr.?
“Saturday Night Live” opened this week’s broadcast within the Trump Tower bed room of Eric (performed by Alex Moffat), as he timidly instructed his older brother, Donald Jr. (Mikey Day), that he feared one thing sinister was in his closet.
Day instructed him: “Eric, there’s no boogeyman in your closet. Have you been watching the news again? You can’t watch that stuff, bud. It’s too grown-up.”
As Don Jr., Day then started to learn Eric a portion of Clement Clarke Moore’s “A Visit From St. Nicholas,” however he was interrupted by a mysterious noise. “There’s something in my closet,” Moffat mentioned.
Day answered: “That’s just the cheap steel dad uses to build his towers. They just groan in the wind.” He then threw open the closet door to reveal Mueller (performed by Robert De Niro, a recurring visitor function), who gave Moffat a silent gesture to warn that he had his eyes on him.
After Day left the bed room to take a name from his lawyer (“How bad is it? … But can I flip on him?”), De Niro sat down together with the mattress subsequent to Moffat.
“Don’t be scared,” De Niro mentioned. “It’s just me, Robert Mueller, your dad’s friend from work.”
Moffat replied, “I’m not allowed to talk to you.”
“That’s fine, Eric,” mentioned De Niro. “It was pretty clear early on that you don’t know anything. I wish I could say the same for some of your dad’s friends.”
As the sketch later wrapped up, Moffat mentioned, “Mr. Mueller, people say you’re the worst thing to ever happen to my dad.”
“No, Eric,” answered De Niro. “Getting elected president was the worst thing that ever happened to your dad.”
In different memorable moments from the present:
Prime-Time Soap Opera of the Week
“S.N.L.” returned to the Oval Office for a mash-up of latest White House intrigue and the Fox collection “Empire” referred to as “Them Trumps.” As a narrator described it, the present is the primary to ask the query “What if Donald Trump was black?”
As the sketch started, President Darius Trump (Kenan Thompson) was instructed by an aide (Moffat) that the partitions had been closing in on him: “They know about Russia,” Moffat mentioned. “They know you used campaign money to cover up an affair with Magic City stripper Cinnamon Mercedes. And they know about the pyramid scheme you’ve been running through your company, Darius Trump Country Hams.”
Thompson responded by starting to ship a dramatic monologue.
“Maybe I’ve done some dirty things, but I’m making America great again,” he mentioned. “And what these feds don’t realize is that I’m the president. The most powerful man in the most respected office in the world. They can’t lock me up. And even though I may be black ——”
At that second, F.B.I. brokers instantly stormed the room and arrested Trump.
“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Thompson quipped.
‘Game of Thrones’ Parody of the Week
If you’ve been arduous up for “Game of Thrones” content material since the newest season resulted in 2017, you would do worse than “Khal Drogo’s Ghost Dojo,” a public entry TV present the place “we talk with some of the hundreds of characters from ‘Game of Thrones’ who have been killed off the show,” as Thompson, a co-host, defined.
The sketch was largely an excuse to let this week’s visitor host, Jason Momoa, reprise his “Game of Thrones” function as the warrior Khal Drogo and to let solid members impersonate “Thrones” characters. It additionally included an trade between Momoa and Heidi Gardner, taking part in Brienne of Tarth, that referenced the latest troubles of Kevin Hart, who withdrew as host of the Academy Awards after refusing to apologize for anti-gay jokes.
In his Dothraki language (translated by subtitles), Momoa said of Gardner, “If this man wants to fight, I’ll give him what he wants.”
Gardner replied incredulously: “Man? Wow, you have a lot to learn about identity politics.”
“You’re right,” a chastened Momoa said in broken English. “Khal need to learn from Khal’s mistakes or Khal never win Oscar. Never host Oscar.”
Taking in the scene, Thompson said, “Wow, what a teachable moment.”
Weekend Update Jokes of the Week
At the “Weekend Update” desk, the anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che continued to riff on the latest developments in the Mueller investigation.
This week, Robert Mueller released the teaser trailer for “Trump: Endgame.” Federal prosecutors said Friday that Michael Cohen committed two election-related crimes at the direction of a person identified as Individual-1. Now, we don’t know for sure who Individual-1 is. But let’s just say things are getting tense right now over at Individual-1 Tower.
Earlier today, Trump called the Mueller report “collusion illusion.” Which is also my favorite Guns N’ Roses album. And yesterday, Trump tweeted, with no context or explanation: “Totally clears the president. Thank you!” Sounds like somebody’s been reading “The Secret.”
Trump is now calling for an end to the Mueller probe, which, I’ve got to admit, it’s worth a shot. You don’t want to go to jail and then find out you could’ve just called it off the whole time. The scariest thing about watching Trump be president is that he tries all the things that I would try. President Trump also tweeted that he “will be doing a major counter report to the Mueller report.” Well, you better hurry up, bud, because you only get one hour a day on that prison computer. Also, nothing says you’re guilty more than making a counter report before the Mueller report is even out. That means he knows it’s going to be bad. That’s like when you’re watching “Cops” and as soon as they pull up to the house, there’s already a shirtless guy on the lawn, saying, “O.K., now first of all, she’s lying.”
Jost also dug into the announcement that Trump’s chief of staff, John Kelly, plans to leave the White House:
President Trump announced today that John Kelly, his chief of staff, is leaving his position at the end of the year, because Kelly requires extensive surgery to remove his palm from his face. That’s how awful it is to work in the Trump White House, by the way. John Kelly spent 40 years in the Marines. He did three tours in Iraq. And he couldn’t finish one tour with Donald Trump.
And Che later went on to offer an awkward defense of sorts for Kevin Hart.
Well, that was short. Kevin Hart had to step down as host of the upcoming Academy Awards because of homophobic tweets from 2011. But didn’t the Academy nominate Mel Gibson for an award just last year? Also, if Kevin Hart isn’t clean enough to host the Oscars, then no black comic is. The only black comic I know that’s cleaner than Kevin Hart is booked for the next three to 10 years. [Here the screen displayed a picture of Bill Cosby.]
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