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CNN aired the primary of two dwell Democratic debates Tuesday evening, and late evening remarked on how tough it’s to listen to from 10 presidential candidates on the stage on the similar time, particularly when Americans aren’t accustomed to a few of them.
“It was actually more pileup than lineup. Ten candidates got seven seconds each to solve the health care crisis. There were more characters than on the show ‘This Is Us’ in this debate.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“Even in a threesome, somebody ends up feeling left out, even if they had the best ideas.” — SETH MEYERS
“Everyone was looking for their moment to stand out. There were big questions for each of them. Questions like, ‘Who the hell are these guys?’” — SETH MEYERS
“Can’t they combine Tim Ryan, Steve Bullock and John Delaney and make them all one guy?” — JIMMY KIMMEL
Noah criticized the CNN moderators for chopping off the candidates once they went over time after which attempting to pit them towards one another.
“Half of those questions might as well have been, ‘Pick three people on this stage: eff, marry, kill, go, go. Like, I felt like at any moment they were about to go, ‘By the way, Elizabeth, did you notice that Klobuchar totally stole your look? Just saying.’” — TREVOR NOAH
There was a lot of floor to cowl, however hosts targeted on a number of the debate’s highlights, including disagreements over health care.
“During her opening statement in tonight’s Democratic debate, Senator Elizabeth Warren said that President Trump disgraces the office of the president every single day, which isn’t fair, because he’s really only in the office like twice a week.” — SETH MEYERS
“It’s hard to sum up what happened tonight, but most of tonight was a bunch of guys with no chance to win the Democratic nomination yelling Republican talking points at the people who can. It was like watching the seven dwarves offering Snow White a poison apple.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“If Hickenlooper is elected, he’ll be like, ‘I promise I will go on Yahoo Answers to see if anyone knows how to fix this thing.’” — TREVOR NOAH
“There she goes, tossing her base some of that red unicorn meat. And the only way to defeat it is to help Harry Potter locate the nine horcrux.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, on Marianne Williamson’s mention of a “dark psychic force”
[As Williamson] “We have a Department of Housing, but not a department of home. We have secretary of education, instead of a secretary of educating. We have a Defense Department instead of a dreamcatcher I bought in Sedona.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“After the first half of tonight’s debate, Google searches for former congressman John Delaney increased 3,400 percent, and still no results.” — SETH MEYERS
“And at this point, now that the dust has cleared, it’s John Hickenlooper’s election to lose.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“I’m not sure the guy polling below 1 percent should be talking about math right now.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, on Delaney debating Sanders on health care
[As Sanders] “I wrote the damn bill, and it’s a good thing you get dental care, Tim, because I just slapped the teeth out of your dirty mouth.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, on Tim Ryan saying Sanders didn’t know something about the health care bill that Sanders, in fact, authored
“Tim Ryan better hope ‘Medicare for all’ passes, because he’s going to need some health care for that burn.” — SETH MEYERS
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